by: Irene Rollins

8 years ago my husband and I were in the infancy stages of launching what is now i5 City Church, I toiled with what it was going to look like for me as “Co-Lead Pastor”. I felt insecure about my role leading the church. The script I kept repeating was that I wasn’t enough. Did God make a mistake? I landed on the truth of the word that God does not make mistakes.

Managing the expectations of what it meant to be a pastor’s wife and a woman in leadership in the church was difficult for me. The pressure I felt when I heard people call me “first lady” or “pastor's wife” had much to do with the expectations I thought people had of me as well as the unending list of expectations I had of myself. I struggled with what I had known and been exposed to as being the model of a “first lady” and knew that the hat, gloves, and trophy wife thing did not suit me.

My husband suggested that I champion our outreach initiatives by climbing Mount Kilimanjaro in Tanzania, Africa to raise money for well projects in remote parts of Tanzania. It was a life changing moment for me that truly awakened the call on my life at a time when I was searching for answers, direction and clarity from God regarding my purpose and role in ministry.

Successfully summiting Kilimanjaro was the hardest thing I have ever done. The guide assigned to help me up the mountain kept reminding me that “you have to respect the mountain” and “take it pole pole” (slowly, slowly in Swahili). When my strength was failing me and I could no longer hear the guide’s voice through the high winds at 19,341 feet above sea level, the Lord reminded me that He is my total source when the climb of life and ministry got hard. I needed this reminder desperately as I faced what I saw as my mountain launching i5 City and walking into a new role in leadership.

I am not sure what mountain you are faced with as you read this. But now is the time to face the mountain and climb! Do the hard thing! Get in counseling, reach out to someone about the addiction you are facing that is spiraling out of control. Get honest with yourself and do whatever it takes to experience the FREEDOM and abundance God has for you.